Confessions...

1. I quit reading To Kill a Mockingbird. I kept thinking, I've already read this, I've already read this. Sorry, couldn't do it.

2. I finished season II of Laguna Beach. R-I-V-E-T-I-N-G.

3. I'm now reading The Baby Whisperer. It is supposed to teach me how to meet my baby's needs without feeding it each time it cries. It cries for different reasons, you know.

4. I'm also reading Glass Castle.

5. My reading list became all askew when you left for Alaska. I hope the cruise was worth it.

6. I'm going to watch The Secret this afternoon at Tod's suggestion. I'd rather read it but my list is full these days.

7. I've only used my water weights and kickboard once this week. I'd rather just lay there.

8. This is what I want to eat all day, everyday (cherry lime flavor):

I miss you

That woman SHOULD have been kicked off for breastfeeding a two year old. You'll be fine. P.S. I saw a Hooter Hider live and in person at the Cheesecake Factory yesterday. HAVE FUN!!

I am going to have to nurse on the plane. Remember the lady who got kicked off her flight for breastfeeding? and then there was a national nurse in? I'm calling out the troops baby.

I love the chair. What I love about it most is the color -- very you. And the pillow on it. My favorite picture is the one where baby is twisted in a seductive pose for the camera. What are you teaching him? My kid will NEVER roll under a bed. Good luck on the cruise.

I will miss you while you're gone. Even though I don't see you, I like to see your pictures and read about your day. I ran four errands today. Don't be mad, but one of them was picking up season II of Laguna Beach. It just happened. I've gotten to that point. I also went to the library and checked out the book. Let the reading begin.

What, pray tell, would I do, with one eye open? I mean really? See the shark's teeth coming at me? Warn the captain to go starboard or whatever? Sheesh. And may I remind you, lil' missy, if we do go down, you become the matriarch of the entire leftover family. Good luck with that.

I would post a picture of my new old chair but I don't know how to work the stupid camera. I mean I've been taught on NUMEROUS occasions HOWEVER, this teaching has not, as they say, stuck. I know a cord is involved. I know pushing a few buttons is involved. I just don't know which cord or which buttons. I'd work harder at it but baby is sucking on the camera strap so it's really not possible.

BTW, baby rolled under the bed yesterday. If his head wasn't sticking out I never would have found him. I'm a fantastic mother. He also almost ate a price tag I left on his teddy bear. You should call Oprah.

ALSO, today I should be doing the wash, buying the diapers, making ready the house, preparing the book stuff, etc. etc. all for my departure but instead I am sitting in my bedroom watching baby suck on a camera strap.

I now am going to take a break from our sponsor and look for the cord thingy so I can show you my new chair because I'm kind of proud of it even though Shelby made it and then Kathy refurbished it and all I did was watch and say things like, Wow, that looks so cool.

Okay, it's now twenty minutes later. I'm back and I think I've got it all figured out. Here are some pictures of baby in his two favorite purple chairs*

*note: pics were inadvertently put at beginning of blog, suri

Spent the morning in the pool. Thinking of all the different people I'd love to visit...but can't. I'd love to come see you and baby. I'd love to see family or friends who live in cool places. But I have to stay here. I feel like Paris when she was on house arrest for 15 hours. It's tough.

However, glad I have a pool, glad I have a moving baby inside, glad Tod is nice, glad you get to go on a fancy cruise this week. Just remember, sometimes they sink.

I'll go to the library today for Mockingbird. I swore I had a copy somewhere but can't find it. Maybe if I cleaned out the garage it would be there. I look at the garage each day, want to clean it each day, and then I get tired when I think about it and I sit down instead. I'm glad Kathy helped you with your room. I may start small and clean our bathroom first. I want to see a real picture of your new old chair. That's exciting!

More later, but just make sure you sleep with one eye open on the cruise...you never know when/if it's going down.

Dear Lovely,
Are you cleaning out your garage? I'm not. Today Kathy helped me clean my room. That was nice. Now I feel better. I have a new used chair that I bought from Shelby. Kathy suggested we dye it. It now looks like this:I like it a lot.

I haven't started Mockingbird but I'm gonna. And I keep thinking about you and your house and your pool and your baby and your family.

Let's see . . . what else . . . I think that's all. I'm tired. My baby doesn't like to sleep and sometimes I laugh.

We were egged last night. I said, Maybe it's because it was the last day of school. T said, No, it's because I used to egg people all the time in high school. I said, Oh.

Thanks for the video. I thought I'd return the favor by sharing the biggest and best news of 2007 thus far. We have a lot to be excited about.

I hope I can look like that after having a baby.

I had nightmares all night about teaching -- the kids wouldn't read, they kept leaving the classroom, they didn't like the book, they'd gang up on me, etc... I woke up and realized - I don't have to worry about this anymore. Now I worry about things like Lansinoh (sp?) and wipes and batteries for the bouncer and leaking amniotic fluid.

Lately, I've used the pool a lot. When my back hurts, I get in the water with my new workout equipment. That includes: two water weights and a kickboard. And then I feel better.

Now I have no school so I have a list of errands to run and maybe I'll organize a garage sale, then clean out the garage. Or maybe I won't do any of these things. Should I start TKAM?

Hooked

Good morning. Because your husband is practically the Hoff, I thought this would brighten your day . . .

Just thought I'd post these. Two of them are of you and two of them are of what you're going to look like after you have a baby. Good luck.

Sounds good to me. I've actually only read it once so it will be a good review. I LOVE the bed and LOVE the bouncer even more. What did you get my baby? Babar will be up this week and I'll post pictures.

Also, how do I blog on Grandma's website?

Also, I am considering a blog for the baby when it comes. I may need help.

What secretaries say to me:

"Are you dilated?"

"That baby has DROPPED!"

"You look like you're ready to pop!"

"That belly doubled since Friday!"

Also, I took a tour of the maternity ward of my hospital and I saw these. And I got a little freaked out. I wish there was some other way...

Also, I want copies of your book to give to the English teachers at my school. I am also planning to send you powerpoints this week. Or next week. I think you'll enjoy them all.

Bye.

True story as in that picture was a real WOMAN who was truly PREGNANT with five babies inside. True story. No kid, no boy -- a real woman. And sometimes, I feel that big. Sometimes.

You're right -- it was endearing that after years of taking the dead, Death stopped and examined human existence because of the Book Thief's life. Yes, and very ironic that Max survived while the healthy Germans in that town did not. Maybe we weren't supposed to ever know the mayor's wife.

I don't think it's shallow to take a long time to finish this book. I think it's laziness. It's easier for me to read a copy of Us Weekly than to pick up a book that means something. We're lazy. And a little shallow but only on the surface. Get it? Only on the surface?

Three more days with students.

Four more weeks until baby.

How many weeks until it will laugh like your baby?

How many weeks until it doesn't hurt to sit?

How many weeks before I figure out how to collapse a stroller while holding a kid and unlock the car door all at once?

What do you mean a true story? The kid is pregnant? I don't understand. I also think it's weird you feel like a fat Asian boy.

Okay.

Here we go . . . I liked the foreshadowing too. It was actually genius in a lot of ways. Rather than wait, he just told the reader exactly what was going to happen--and of course if one of the main characters is going to die you have to find out the details. We thrive on stuff like that.

Ummm, Mayor's wife. I wanted more. I wanted to understand her. I guess it's okay.

Anne of Green Gables. Yeah. I could see it although Papa played a bigger part than Matthew.

I wished they would have kissed.

Ironic she saw Max again. He survived but no one else did? Interesting.

What about death? What is death like? I wondered where he takes them? I liked the point of view. Made me think about what a huge and sad job it would be and the Book Thief was the girl who made him stop and think.

What else, ummm, I wonder why it was so hard for me to get through. Your mom read it in like five days. I read the Boy Book and the Virgin Suicides in twenty four hours. The Book Thief took me about two months. Does that make me shallow? I think sort of.

Are you sitting on the shore of a lake right now?
Does your baby do somersaults?
I took Van to the doctor because he was coughing.
The doctor said he was fine.
So I took him swimming.
I think that's bad.

That's funny...this is what I look like right now:

This picture is a true story by the way.

So about the Book Thief:

1. When you say foreshadowing, do you mean how we always sort of knew what would happen because Death told us first? I actually liked it because it made me pay closer attention to details so that when it did happen, I could put all the pieces together. Like Rudy's death. It was nice instead of an author trying to surprise us when everyone dies so we cry and cry because it's such a surprise.

2. Anne of Green Gables because a. orphaned girl b. hard-ass adoptive mother who softens and really likes having her around c. big hearted male figure who always cheers her up and then d. beating the odds by becoming the smartest, best reader ever...

3. The Mayor's wife whole leaving the window open with cookies sometimes was sort of Boo Radley-ish to me but still exciting. She was sad about her son and the war and her husband wasn't emotionally available? Or back then she just had to keep quiet?

4. Also, how did you feel about she and Max finding each other eventually? Sort of like yeah right but then great because he had been through a lot.

5. I loved the point of view, I liked the fact that she stole stuff, I liked Rudy but felt the saddest when he was dead and she'd never kissed him yet. That part probably made me the saddest.

I'm sorry Baby is sick but maybe it was your almond milk? I have no desire to make, drink or think about almond milk.

I'm picking up Babar pictures today framed so then I'll send pictures of the baby room. I like the powerpoint idea a lot -- or something like it. Some teacher assigns a project and you get to see into characters better by seeing what they come up with for the presentation. The funniest, too, is when horrible students use huge words they can't even pronounce.

Me: Mohamad, what does the word 'juxtaposition' mean?

Sideways hugs? REally? Why?

This is what I look like right now:

I don't know why. It's weird. I just woke up and I was Bette Midler.

I think we should talk about the Book Thief before I forget everything.
I have some things:

1. What was going on with the Mayor's wife?
2. Did you like the foreshadowing in the book?
3. Kind of ironic, the whole thing, ehh?
4. Anne of Green Gables? But then everyone dies?
5. Would your students read this?
6. Did you like the ending?
7. Etc. etc.?

Also, I am making almond milk. I thought I'd try it . . . . because you know, I have nothing better to do. I'll let you know how it turns out.
Baby is sick. Coughing/hacking, sneezing, runny nose. So sad.
But he is still happy.



How's your baby?
How's the pool?
How's the lesbian powerpoint?
How's the lake?

Okay. Goodbye.