I'm not sure if eating intuitively would work for me. I'd buy the warring foods...and eat them. I hope it works out for you and Baby. Let me know your progress. I need to come to your house for dinner...

Today in class I had to separate two lesbians (self proclaimed and proud of it) because they were playing with each other's hair. They may allow that on the softball bus but not in my class.

Thank goodness Sandra Bullock's husband is okay. They say the host of Monster Garage or whatever can't get run over. I say anything can happen so thank goodness it's over.

Of course he still loves her...

I defend my final portfolio on Wednesday.

I weigh 164 lbs.

Daniqua says if I keep putting my hands in the air the umbilical cord will wrap around the baby's neck and it will die. My doctor asked if she was from Texas when I told him. He also said NOT TRUE.

I am very worried about Sandra Bullock and her husband. It's horrible. We have to refer to him just as SB's husband because he's not famous enough to get his own name in the People headline. It must be very hard. I can't imagine how hard that would be. Anyway, tragic story, really.

I also am quite distraught because I am trying to eat intuitively. That means I have to make peace food. PEACE not war, peanut M&Ms. PEACE not war, chocolate milk. PEACE not war, chips and salsa. Here's how you make peace with the foods you are fighting with

1. you buy lots and lots of the warring food.
2. you realize that you have lots and lots of it so it's not going to run out
3. you tell yourself that it's actually not bad and you can eat as much as you want and you shouldn't feel guilty
4. you eat it but only if you really want it
5. you eventually don't want to eat it so much because you can and because it's not bad and because it is now not so enticing
6. so basically intuitive eating is like dating--once you get the guy, it's not so interesting anymore and you don't really want him . . . unless of course you marry him which is a whole different ballgame because then you'd be married to peanut butter cups or burnt almond fudge ice cream but that would actually make sense because you know when you say you LOVE nachos and then your friend says, So why don't you marry it and then you say Okay, I think I will but then you never actually do it. maybe with intuitive eating you actually DO marry the food. I'll have to do more research.
   

my house is now full of food--everything mentioned above. And I am intuitively eating it, one peanut m&m at a time.

Mr. Baby stuck one foot in the warm water of the bathtub and immediately started peeing all over the place. Cam couldn't have been happier.

And finally, though I do get distracted by The Bachelor (and who can blame me for that), I have been reading the Book Thief.

Yard Work

I became restless the other day and decided to trim bushes. For the first time. Here are some shots of my best work...

Sad part of the story...there was one bush that was particularly bushy and I couldn't really see where I was cutting. I trimmed, trimmed, trimmed and thought the yard looked great. Until T pointed out that I'd cut a bush from its root - meaning, it's now going to die because I can't trim bushes. Here's its final photo before wilting. Notice where the cut is...

On a lighter note, I'm about 130 pages into the book. This week may become crazy with graduating stuff but after that I'll have more time. I'm liking it, too. ESPECIALLY the story about Jesse Owens -- painting his face black. I loved that story.

I'm about, ummmmm, sixty pages into BT and I get the Anne of Green Gables thing now. I'm definitely intrigued by the whole set up/death/random notes format although I felt the same way about Messenger and . . . well, we both know how that turned out. How far are you?

Today I thought about marijuana smoked in the back of a tenth grade classroom. How is that done? Without getting caught? I guess they did get caught BUT why did they think they wouldn't get caught?

Also, today I made strawberry jam. Yesterday I made chocolate cake and tomorrow I'm making whole wheat bread. Maybe. Oh, and I am trying intuitive eating so none of this will affect me.

What else, what else? Jude Law has a new girlfriend. Britney Spears is on a diet. The Bachelor is my new show and I found the link to the teenreads list that I wanted you to look over. See if anything catches your fancy. We need a queue.

I just watched a really funny Will Ferrell video that our blog fans might enjoy.

I just finished typing two papers due this week so I wanted to celebrate...and blog. Then I'll eat an ice cream sandwich on top of the peanut M&Ms I had for dinner.

I just wanted to say that one of my students has two regular stud earrings, then his second earring is a safety pin. I asked him today if he pierced it himself.

Him: (looking at me like I'm stupid) Yeaaaaaaaaahhhhh...

Me: Did it hurt?

Him: No.

Me: Did you clean it first?

Him: No.

Me: Do you think you contracted diseases from it?

Him: (looks at me like I'm stupid)

Me: So you didn't sterilize it?

Him: I burned it first.

Me: Ahhhhhh! See, then that's cleaning it! Good for you!

Today in Julius Caesar we read about how Portia killed herself by swallowing hot coals. I told my class that if they're thinking about trying it, maybe cut the coals into sections of four first...that way they'll go down easier and you can just pop 'em one by one.

This kid says out loud, "You're sick."

Singing

Sometimes when I'm walking out to the parking lot, I pass a classroom with the lights off. Lights off, overhead on, the room is full of students.

They're singing.

They're reading words from an overhead projector and singing without instruments or music. Kids who don't have a place anywhere else come and sing in this classroom after school.

No cheerleaders.

No basketball players.

No student council.

Just kids whose place is in that classroom to sing with the lights off so no one can see their face when they sing loud.

Maybe I wish I would do stuff like that but never did and never will.

Wolf Workshops. Take a few of those and THEN we'll talk.

I hope you're not exhausted because of the shower. I am so excited and appreciate it so much. I cannot wait to come this weekend. Got home today and the pizza I bought last night was gone. Those boys must've forgotten I'm pregnant and hungry most times.

There was a discussion and garage won't work in the summer when it's 115 degrees outside. It all boils down to saving $6,000 on renting a space. I agreed we needed to save but I did NOT agree to share my pizza.

I'm tired, too. Still need to share my post office story but my back hurts.

It's okay that you don't have the book thief yet. I won't read it all weekend. Tried to read more last night and it put me to sleep. Most things do. Right now it has sort of an Anne of Green Gables feel to it. You'll see soon. Kiss baby for me -- can't wait to talk to him this weekend about the paternity case, etc...

Ellis warns those watching though that "it's very dangerous for people who haven't been trained, who think that they can just walk into a wolf pack and be accepted."
Crap.
So I can't just walk in? Can I crawl in? Scamper in?

Sorry about the office thing. Very sorry. Was there a discussion? Is there a way they can use only the garage? Like a garage office? Office garage?

I don't have much to say. I'm tired and sort of drained. It happens a lot these days. I think I have a couple of important stories but I can't exert the energy to type them right now. Too bad.

Maybe tomorrow. No copy of book thief yet.

There is a documentary on National Geographic this month about a man who left his family to live with wolves in the wild. Now that's a good reason to order cable...

Custody Shmustody

He'll get custody. As long as he's not a crack addict who's homeless without a job...those are the things he has to prove now and then the multi-million dollar baby is his.

Right now I sort of want to crawl into a tight space and cry. I am trapped in my house. T decided to turn our house into his office this summer to save money. So instead of conducting meetings, trainings, mail distribution, etc...in another place, it is happening at our house. Every day. Here's what this means for me:

no access to my kitchen while they're here
i come home to five cars crowding my driveway
no tv access
two rows of chairs where my kitchen table used to be
a huge white board blocking my way to the front door
my garage full of chairs, paperwork, huge maps of the city
working all day and coming home...to this

For some reason it's really upsetting me right now. I know T knows I hate it, but he's trying to save a six month lease on another space. So I think I'll just leave even though I'm tired and just want to watch Ellen.

I rarely answer my phone. I do have days like that. You feel like you don't want a conversation about anything. And sometimes, it's better to just let voicemail pick up so you can hear the reason they called and evaluate whether or not it's important enough to HAVE a conversation.

I'm like that about the mail, too. I think it's denial, but there are times when I let the mail sit and sit and sit because I don't want to read bank statements or newsletters for teachers. Sometimes I open just the bills and the rest stays in a pile that I stare at for weeks.

Does anyone read our blogs? Probably not. Maybe we need more pictures, but not of leftovers.

People in people.com that I don't care about:

Avril Lavigne
Beyonce
Kate Moss
Ashlee Simpson
any of the Desparate Housewives

I need to get out of this house.

Yes, this whole paternity thing is quite distressing. I wonder what Howard was thinking. Of course I heard on the radio that paternity is one thing and custody another--just because Larry B. is the bio father, it doesn't necessarily mean he'll get the baby. Hmmm. Quite distressing.

Umm, do you have days when you can't return a phone call? Like it'd kill you to call anyone back. And you can't answer the phone so the list of needtocallbacks keeps getting longer and longer and longer and you keep getting deeper and deeper and deeper into the depths of nowaycanIcallanyonebackataller? I just could not, for the life of me, call anyone back or respond to any responsibilities. I don't know why. I just had to sit on my butt. Hold the baby. Watch TV on the internet. Eat chocolate chips. And NOT answer the phone. It didn't matter if it was my mom, my therapist (I don't actually have one but for the sake of explanation), my religious leader, or my neighbor, I could not answer the %*&* phone.

I am now officially watching the Bachelor.

I still don't have a copy of the Book Thief.

Writing Thief is weird.

My butt is getting bigger every day.

And finally, last but not least, do you think anyone reads this besides me or you? It'd be funny if they did because we are freaking hilarious.

Sassafrass?

I just want to say that Dannielynn's eyes were a dead giveaway. Of course she is Larry Birkhead's daughter. What a slam on Howard K. Stern...and Anna. Not knowing exactly who the father is of a child? What a weird concept.

Also, why are you having a hard time getting back to people? You mean returning phone calls? Visits? Explain please.

I called that Leeza Gibbons would be eliminated from Dancing w/the Stars tonight. I was right, in case you care. I'm sure you knew just from reading your TV guide.

I have a sad story that took place at the post office but I'll have to post it later. Too tired, so tired.

Try this, you sassafras. I suggest we start a queue like blockbuster or netflicks. We should get us a list and then work our way through it. This is causing me too much stress. Let's go for Book Thief although I don't have it yet and since it is being hailed book of the freaking year, it's hard to get my hands on it AND btw, it is huge--I'm with you there.

Also, why does Ashlee Simpson ever make people.com. Does anyone really care about her? I mean really? And what's with Anna's journals. Sad. So sad.

And finally, I am having a hard time responding to anyone these days. It's like everything takes so much effort. I'm trying to pull myself out of it.

Okay, hello, goodbye. I hope to post pictures soon.

You're Back

I just saw your blog from a few days ago, so I wanted to comment on a few of your...comments.

First off, I agree -- why did he wait so long to fix each card?

Also, I had to read, then reread that whole shot in the air scene on the cliff...did he shoot him, was it just in the leg so he'd slowly die crawling to a highway, what happened? I finally figured it out but I hate when I feel like steps are skipped by the author. Or maybe I'm just slow...no, the author skipped a few steps.

I didn't realize it had won the prinz (sp?) award. Why didn't I know that? That sort of amazes me. Other teachers who have read it agreed it wasn't THAT that great. They all rave about Book Thief, though. In fact, one has it on her poster of "Book of the Year" she'd recommend to students. It's sitting on my desk and it looks so big and daunting and I keep getting scared there are more face cards I'll have to read about. I'm up for whatever but need a book soon. Now it keeps me sane as these days begin to drag by...

Also, how did he know to give that mom her own ice cream? I probably wouldn't have thought of that. Sort of annoying how he got all the clues right.

I agree; I was intrigued when Sylvia Plath was a clue but then all it led to was Bell Street. However, that movie man made me sort of sad. I did feel for some of the characters but it was almost too brief and spread too thin. Would it KILL Zusack to write a shorter book?

Your crap link doesn't work. Try again, mama.

Also, I see the pattern...we have read all award-winning books. I guess I was looking for one I thought DESERVED an award and then RECEIVED an award. I may be looking forever. I'd go to your website but once again...your crap link...

I called you today to clarify on Angelina. I give her and Brad two more years -- TOPS. She is too much to handle. And now there's Pax and she truly went back on her word about being a stay at home mom and took a movie deal. Hypocrites shouldn't adopt kids.

Two new couples to watch for: Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds (ex-fiance of Alanis M.), then Jake Gyllenhall and Reese Witherspoon.

Apple pancakes from scratch? When are you making those for me? Sounds better than our Easter cereal dinner. T opted for Golden Grahams while I splurged with Lucky Charms.

Everything we have read so far has won an award (monster, I am the messenger, looking for alaska). Maybe we should pick a book that hasn't won an award--we could decide which book SHOULD win an award. There's a bunch of books at this link . They are teen picks--so they haven't won any major awards (yet--I think) but they could. Why don't you peruse the titles and let me know what jumps out.

Uh yeah, it was easter yesterday but the bunny, bless his heart, skipped our house. I was extremely upset and had to come up with a story for baby because he was confused: Why didn't bunny didn't stop here? Was I bad? I tried to explain that bunny doesn't care if we're bad or good. He just drops off eggs and chocolate and missed our house this year.
But why?
I don't know, son.
I feel sad.
I do too.
Then we talked about momma's from-scratch apple pancakes and why that made up for the lack of eggs. YUM.

The shower will be pleasant.

DId you get my message about angelina jolie? I'm so confused. Please reply.

No, I wouldn't recommend it to my students. I don't think it was engaging enough and the ending was not satisfying, either. My students want something that is interesting and something that leaves them with a bang. Someone dies, someone overdoses, someone cheats, etc...
I would like to read a book that has won an award. I don't care which one. I love books that use the word scrotum. So work from there.

My spring break is over but I'm not going to feel sad...I'm taking a long weekend for the shower and I'm actually really excited for the whole event! Will anyone show up? You and me...my mom...

So are you back on the internet? Welcome.

Today didn't feel like Easter, probably because we didn't cook anything.

Umm, did we just post at the exact same time? That was weird.

So you finished the book. I finished it like a week ago and I can't remember who set him up and why. Obviously not too memorable. I'd ask you to recap it for me but it doesn't matter. One question though: would you recommend it to your students? Just curious.

Okay, what to read next, what to read next. There are a bunch of new novels out that are in this class of 2k7 group I heard about. There's also a lot of lists we could pull from--like the lists on teen reads or we could pick from the award list. There was huge controversy with the newberry this year because the word scrotum was on the first page. We could always read that. What do you think?

I Am the Messenger

Finished the book last night and felt a lot like the way I feel when I watch a scary movie. It starts out and hooks me with some new or scary idea...the plot thickens...I start thinking this may be a pretty good movie...and then the story is taken too far, the characters get on my nerves, the twists and turns become unbelievable and the end is like a quick fix to finish off the movie before it goes over three hours.

Didn't think much of the book.

Somehow it was a page turner but I think the reason was simply because I hoped it would get good. Or better. In my last blog I said I'd throw up if the two of them got together in the end...that whole hallway scene was out of the blue and without reason. I also don't get who the guy was that orchestrated the whole card thing...it was so fuzzy and full of explanations through dialogue at the end that I was just struggling finish the book. I also don't like the whole bank robber coming back and making him look at a mirror. Bull-freaking-crap.

The saddest part is that this book had a lot of potential. In the beginning I liked the idea of this mysterious card and when he went to that first house with the raping, I thought the book may take a serious or relevant turn. A few of the people's stories were touching but in the end of the book...I didn't care.

So what? I finish the book and ask myself SO WHAT?

So, maybe we're supposed to learn that anyone can be who they want to be....mediocrity is not our only choice?

Or, maybe we're supposed to all relate to this average-Joe character and compare him to ourselves: "Hey, I'm just an average guy...maybe if I start helping people I'll get that girl to like me back" or "I don't have many talents, but maybe if I start checking my mail for face cards..."

The list goes on and on and on.

The book didn't touch me personally and I felt the ending was like this quick, abrupt, sloppy five pages to end an almost 400 page book...as quickly as possible. It was too calculated, too sequential for me. The idea is cool, though.

I'd like to hear your take in a million years when your internet is up and running again.

Until then -- what shall we read next?! I want a new author.

I'm back

Okay, digis is my new internet provider and if I get five people to say "coco recommended digis" I can get five years free. So I'm finally back up and running. I haven't caught up yet although I did see that J. Lo would never be a size zero and that there is an investigation in to Anna's physician. I'll have to get reading and then I'll have more to say on that front.

Now, for messenger . . . first off, I was intrigued in the beginning. Like you, I found the premise fresh and interesting. I think the main character is likeable--what's his name again?--and all of them seem, you know, cool or something. The voice works and yeah, the dickhead thing and arse, pretty funny.

However, I agree, it got a little old. I was also like, huh? he can wait like weeks and weeks to do things for these people? How did he know that? He gets the first card and he takes a LONG time to get around to actually doing anything. AND when he has an address, like you said, he "just knows" what to do. Oh, and did you think he'd actually shot the edgar street guy? or I think for some reason I thought he'd shot in the air and the guy freaked out and fell off a cliff. In any case, I thought he was dead until he wonders if he hitched a ride back to town, etc.

Also, how did the someone who orchestrated this whole thing get accomplices? The guy he chases, Barry and Darryl (or whatever their names are) etc. We can discuss this more extensively when you've finished the novel.

Also also, there are a lot of plot points that felt a bit stretched. Fortunately they weren't SO annoying that I wanted to put the book down. I was still intrigued. Especially when Sylvia Plath was a clue. I liked the polynesian family but just some Christmas lights? And how did the guy behind the plan know he'd realize all this stuff about his mom and vice versa. Oh, and I knew from the beginning that the last card was going to be hearts and that his buddies would be the projects. It was inevitable. So, long story short, I understand why this won the printz. It's clever like you said, funny in parts, and has a nice message without feeling too messagy. However, it got a little stale mid-way through and was a bit predictable. Oh well.

I wonder what he did with The Book Thief. It's supposed to be amazing. Do you still want to read it next or do you want a chick read break?

Concerns and Compliments

Concerns: I'm not sure that I buy into the idea that these characters are 19-21 years of age, and they are acting like they're in their mid-40's already. Most people at that age don't have a great job, lots of money or tons of ambition. I think that whole aspect of the book takes away from it's legitimacy because give me a break...a 19 year old can be a cab driver without shame. They act like they're all having a mid-life crisis.

I also keep wondering how he always just knows what to do. Why? If I received those cards, or those names, or those addresses, I would NOT know what to do. Plus, Audrey is the last one left and if they end up together, I might throw up a little bit in my mouth.

Compliments: I like that his mom calls him Dickhead Ed.

At first the concept of the cards intrigued me, but it's almost like I've read about six face cards too many. Oh wait, that's a concern, not a compliment.

More later when I finish but those issues weigh on my mind right now. Not heavily, though, as this book has not affected me as we spoke about earlier on the phone. It's a little too "Pay It Forward" for me without the teacher with burn marks and that creepy kid from Sixth Sense.